A4: The Zen of Winter Driving

Some say that driving a car has distinct sexual overtones. Perhaps so, when one is at the wheel of a Porsche 911 on a winding road where speed limits are symbolic gestures and the traffic light and sympathetic. Well, accepting the allegory for what it is worth, driving an A4 Quattro has definite philosophical connotations. Rather than rampant sex at every turn it is more like striding through life in the manner of a competent German gentleman. There is no contradiction in terms here.

The manner in which one goes by the walk of life has profound impact on every step taken and, ultimately, on the quality of the outcome. Apparently, the philosophy of Zen has a few things to say on the topic. On a more light-hearted note along these lines, we have had Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig as well as The Inner Game of Tennis by Timothy Gallwey.

Robert Pirsig elaborates on the philosophy of quality while Timothy Gallwey goes on about a more enduring approach to peak performance when it counts. The Audi A4 seems to have taken more than a few leafs out of each book. Although, in the end I do believe Audi would benefit from reading each entire work, cover to cover, on a quiet winter's day.

Which brings me to driving in the winter, in New England. Such driving is notorious for several reasons - all hazardous and involving slipping, sliding and getting stuck. The slippery bits happen when least expected, either on poorly scrapped snowed surfaced or on various mixes of iced surfaces, including the infamous black ice. Getting stuck is a simple matter of no traction in piles of snow, however contrived.

In the above conditions, the A4 Quattro goes about its business with quiet understatement. So much so, if not consciously noting, one may overlook the brilliance of the achievement, delivered in true fashion of a gentleman. Its prowess along treacherous road conditions passes effortlessly.

Sometimes, one must remind oneself of the old days of slipping and sliding over black ice along the streets and free ways fully to appreciate the newly found serenity of passage along these roads. With barely a wriggle, the A4 shrugs at slippery surfaces and treads a sure path while its driver may wonder what about the fuzz is. It is quite extraordinary.

The Quattro family of Audi has been accused in the past by certain car journalists of being too serene, sort of sterile. Well, if I were to choose between a sterile handling of a potentially disastrous black ice infection and a randy, cavalier broadside into the Armco barrier or worse, then I would choose sterile serenity any day, thank you Sir. Keep your M3 for the sunny Californian south coast.

Deep snow still awaits me this winter - we have had barely a dusting so far. But I am confident that getting stuck in piles of snow will not be my lot this winter, as it had in the winter of 2005/2006 when adverse road conditions overcame my rather compromised VW GTi at the time and I had to walk home the last 100 metres up hill.

However, I do have some gripes with Audi over minor quality issues regarding some trimmings and a persistent dashboard buzz, sympathetic to a specific engine speed and inputs from the road. And that otherwise wondrous 2.0 FSI engine is as rough as an industrial diesel when cold. But the A4 redeems itself time and time again whenever the going gets tough through its sheer, honest competence.

Now Audi must just teach the Quattro to clear itself of snow at the press of a button. And when it is at it, do the front porch as well.